Avalon
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Spartan 'Black Broth'Well, I saw 300. And for the last hour or so I've been obsessed with Spartan food- which seems like Greek food... and then I found out about 'Black Broth', and someone who's made it! Robbed from:
http://joeslavko.livejournal.com/tag/my+evening+meal
| Quote: | Today I decided to make the famous Spartan black broth (τραγως) as I was feeling in a militaristic mood. Plutarch relates how it was once cooked and fed to Dionysius, the Tyrant of Sicily. “But when the king tasted it,” says Plutarch, “he spat it out in disgust, whereupon the cook said, 'O King, it is necessary to have exercised in the Spartan manner, and to have bathed in the Eurotas, in order to relish this broth.'" The clear implication, therefore, is that, unless you've killed a few thousand Persians and then had a bath beforehand, the stuff tastes like shit.
Unfortunately I could find no recipe for it other than a brief description by Plutarch himself who mentions that it comprised blood, pork, and vinegar. Basically, that sounds to me like a sort of liquid haggis or black pudding. Consequently, I could see no reason why it shouldn’t be perfectly palatable, with or without post-dead Persian ablutions. Herein, then, is my version which I created about an hour ago:
Ingredients:
About ½ lb of Cumberland black pudding, diced into small pieces
1 small onion, finely diced
1 tbsp red wine vinegar
2 rashers of smoked back bacon, finely chopped
½ pint of pork stock
¼ cup of pearl barley
1 tsp paprika
3 cloves of garlic, chopped
Seasoning
Olive oil
Method:
Fry your onion in the olive oil and, as it browns, chuck in the bacon. Fry for about five minutes or so. Then add the garlic, barley, paprika, and seasoning and simmer for around half an hour or until reduced to something like a goulash. Finally, at the last minute, put in the black pudding and the red wine vinegar. But I stress at the last minute. The black pudding will disintegrate if it’s over-cooked. Serve with pitta bread and a salad.
Result:
Not bad. Certainly not as puke-inducing as some ancient commentators suggest. Plus, there were side-benefits. Upon tasting it, my abs became supremely well-defined and my pectoral muscles pumped up dramatically. At the same time, I felt a sudden need to kick the shit out of Asiatics and Africans. And this afternoon, I’ll go round the Bumbles Green area and inspect the infants and small children. Although I imagine they’re mostly physically sound, quite a few are nonetheless fucking ugly, so I should be able to convince their parents to tip them down a ravine. Then I’ll come back and have the rest of my τραγως.
I shall ready my hors d’oeuvres and eat hearty ….. FOR TONIGHT I DINE IN HELL! |
ARRRGGGHHH!!!
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My Bad.
